Signs You've Been In Band Too Long

Nope, didn't write it. I found it instead at a hand out at Band Camp. Sadly, I am guilty of far too many of these.

1. When you hear music and start marking time.

2. When you walk behind someone and you're in step with them.

3. When you try to guess the tempo of your favorite song.

4. When all your friends are in band.

5. When you don't mind changing clothes on the bus. (*shudders*)

6. When you point out key changes and dynamics while listening to the radio.

7. When every guy/girl you're interested in is in the band.

8. When you LIKE wearing your uniform. (Right...)

9. When people ask you about your social life and you say, "Oh, you mean my flute/trumpet/drum?"

10. When you consider your music lyre a fashion accessory.

11. When you've had a 'trombone-ectomy.' (WTF?!)

12. When you practice your instrument more than you walk your dog. (Or cat...)

13. When winning a 'Flank-Off' is more important than getting and 'A' in Algebra II.

14. When people worry when they DON'T see you with your instrument. (In my case 'do')

15. When 'armed' guard' means a girl with a pole instead of a guy with a gun.

16. When band camp is FUN. (*dies*)

17. When you respond to 'band geek.'

18. When you realize that there aren't hills, sidewalks, and ruts on a 'REAL' football field.

19. When you remember sharps and flats more easily than your name.

20. When you 'dress-down' the lunch line, and urge others to do the same. (*blank stare*)

21. When you think that Frisbee IS played with drumheads. (It's what Ghetto bands do)

22. When '8-to-5' feels normal.

23. When your instrument has a name. (ALL BOW DOWN BEFORE DARTH-FLUTE!!)

24. When you remember your instrument's birthday, and forget your mom's.

25. When making a rank is your biggest accomplishment of the day.

26. When back marching no longer reminds you of ballet. (O_o)

27. When you give your instrument a birthday party.

28. When you use electrical tape because you forgot black socks. (Hey, that was my idea!)

29. When your uniform fits. (Is that possible?)

30. When you see your band section more often than you see your family.

31. When you think your band section IS your family. (Complete with the hatred and feuds)

32. When everyone wants to 'kill' the other football team, you want to 'kill' the other band.

33. When you have dreams about selling candy bars.

34. When you think evening practices should last a half hour longer. (*dies* Take II)

35. When you accidentally call your band director 'Dad.' (*dies* Take III)

36. When you CAN sight-read.

37. When you can put on your uniform in less than 4 minutes. (Try fewer than two, punk)

38. When reeds taste good. (I prefer to smoke them...)

39. When fast food is a part of your daily diet.

40. When you think your 'Tam-beret' looks cool. (Sure...)

41. When marking time is your favorite form of exercise.

42. When you have a neck strap/harness tan line.

43. When you subconsciously start practicing a new song with a pencil.

44. When numbers past 8 aren't important.

45. When you're more opinionated about the Keith/Roosevelt band rivalry than who is going to win the Super Bowl. (Steelers PWN)

46. When you roll-step through the cafeteria so you don't spill your lunch.

47. When you rather practice than read this list. (Or type it...)

48. When letters past G aren't important.

49. When you don't mind getting up at midnight to take a 6 hour bus ride so that you can compete for the whole morning and throw up on park riders, just to take a 6 hour bus ride home that gets you there at 4 am the next morning.

50. When you get the jokes on this list. (...)